It is very difficult and painful, but if you can, I encourage you to read his entire letter posted with the article. Zeller left a gift to all of us by naming his pain.
From The Huffington Post Here:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/01/07/bill-zeller-dead-princeto_n_805689.html
Bill Zeller, Princeton Grad Student And ‘Brilliant’ Programmer, Dies In Apparent Suicide
First Posted: 01- 7-11 08:40 AM | Updated: 01- 7-11 03:16 PM
Zeller stunned the programming community with a 4,000-word suicide note detailing a childhood of physical and sexual abuse, which he had never before disclosed to anyone.
Bill Zeller, a Princeton Ph.D candidate and renowned internet programmer, died Wednesday from injuries sustained in a suicide attempt. He was 27.
Thank you so very much for posting about the tragedy of Bill Zeller. Several of us, from abusive christian residential lock-up homes, fear that this letter will not be online for very long because of Bill’s focus on the atrocities within the IFB (Independent Fundamental Baptist) denomination to which his family belongs.
I am not here to get into a debate regarding which denomination harbors more sexual predators, Catholicism or the IFB. I am here to say how horrible it is that it takes something like the death of Bill Zeller to bring to the forefront the prevalence of sexual abuse of children within the IFB. The focus on the Catholics, and perhaps the misconception that ONLY the Catholics are guilty of such horrors against children needs to end QUICKLY, before this happens to anyone else.
My heart aches due to the fact that Bill’s rapist was not named. However, his letter brings an important question to my mind. The first being how many adults would have had access to a 4 yr old boy? Surely, someone that his parent(s) trusted. And over a long period of time. It would make sense to me that, considering he was not of school age when this abuse started that either it was a family member or someone from his CHURCH! Yes, his church. Even minimal research will show that the IFB is a perfect haven for pedophiles and sexual predators. More often than not, the victim is shamed or frightened into silence. And for the perps who ARE discovered, it is sadly common for the church to “handle it within the church” rather than notify the authorities. The perp is “forgiven”, usually allowing them to commit the same horror against another child. Repeat offenders of sexual abuse is VERY common within the IFB. This link will show a drop in the bucket, reflecting ONLY those that have been caught:
http://www.stopbaptistpredators.com
Another ploy used by the IFB is to blame the VICTIM. Consider the story of Tina Anderson. She was raped more than once by a deacon in her IFB Church, who is a man named Ernie Willis, a married father. At the age of 15, Tina discovered that she had become pregnant by Willis. Upon reporting what he did to the pastor of her church, a man by the name of Phelps, Tina was made to stand before the congregation of her church and APOLOGIZE for becoming pregnant. The pastor sent her out of state to have her baby and avoid being interviewed by law enforcement. Ernie Willis is due to go to trial soon. Tina’s family was so immersed in the mind-numbing and mind CONTROLLING clutches of the IFB that they followed the pastor’s instructions without question.
Jocelyn Zichterman, founder of the Freedom from Abuse Network (and a victim of abuse within the IFB herself) has helped make tremendous strides toward the exposure of all the cover-ups and corruption through the decades within the IFB denomination. Apparently, this exposure has ruffled quite a few feathers, because the facebook page she created for survivors of abuse within the IFB, “Survivors of IFB Cult Abuse” was reported by what we believe to be the IFB (who else would have done it?)as a “hate” group or something to that effect, and taken down. In it’s place, more than 20 OTHER “IFB cult Survivors” groups have been created. They are not hard to find. A simple facebook search will take you to them. I encourage everyone to go there and look.
Being a former resident of an IFB “lock-down” home, the infamous New Bethany Girls Home, operated by Mack Ford (Mack W. Ford), myself and a multitude of others, whether residents of New Bethany, Hephzibah House, Victory Christian Academy, Heritage Boys Academy, Bethesda Girls/Boys Home (Lester Roloff), Reclamation Ranch (Jack Patterson)ALL understand the URGENCY to help the general public KNOW what really goes on within the IFB. PLEASE LISTEN BEFORE ANOTHER PERSON DIES AS A RESULT OF THE SAME THING THAT HAPPENED TO BILL ZELLER. The IFB does not need to be allowed to produce another wasted life.
I recently read this and some other posts on the same subject. It took a while for me to get my thoughts together, but I finally did…and posted them on my blog. http://asurvivorsthoughtsonlife.wordpress.com/2011/01/16/sui-well-you-get-the-idea/